How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
