If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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