Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
