Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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