I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
