found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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