Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
