my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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