gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
