The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
