Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
