so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
