i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
