You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
