then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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