I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
