Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
