is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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