And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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