Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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