Have you finally orgasmed yet?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
