Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Found the puke drawer
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
