i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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