idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
