Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
