If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
