Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
