member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
