morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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