so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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