I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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