Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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