She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize
