you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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