Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
