Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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