He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize