I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We were destined to go to rehab together
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
