Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
honey bunches of taint.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i drank out of a bidet.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
