I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
