Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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