Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
