i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
