Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
