Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
