I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
