Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Randomize
