Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
So much Jack, so little girl.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
