I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
