i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I'm like, not good at living.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize